Cornucopia
Have I used this title before? Will google blogger alert me if I did? This is becoming a common question. Maybe this is a sign that I blog too much. Oh well.
I have been thinking about ambition lately. About what it means and what it means to me, in particular. I always believed that I wasn't very ambitious. I am only now finding out that that isn't really true. Sure, I might not be driven to assume powerful positions or rake in loads of money. Or become world famous. No, what I am after is broader, less measurable and yet far more tangible to me. Freedom and control. Freedom to work around my life and its' schedules and control over how I spend my time. A life that allows me to learn and grow, hopefully at work too. Learn and grow for the sake of learning and growth. A life where the everyday realities, practicalities and cynicism are well balanced by dreams and hopes realized. Where joy is a frequent visitor and laughter can be taken for granted every once in a while. Where the imperfections of people and relationships still allow for the general gratitude of their being around. Where a sense of purpose and an awareness of its (life's) beauty, fleeting beauty, revitalizes me often enough for me to not drag my feet around too long. Where my wants and wishes are in line with my capacity and faculties. Where the mind might be pensive, but not for too long and where most days, if they don't begin with hope, at least end with it. Sanguine.
That's plenty ambitious, don't you think ?
On a different note, I will always be a kid. I spent more than an hour at Target today, picking up everyday things. The good part about putting off doing such *required* shopping for a while is that you discover some lost joys when you go back to it. It's been quite a while. So, as I walked around the brightly colored Bath section and looked at all the shades of bath rugs and towels, walked past all those beautiful lamps and shades in the Home Decor section, carted by all those lovely hats and scarves next to the Shoes section, and wheeled slowly around the shiny and metallic Kitchen section, I smiled. It is so cool to be an adult and walk around the store and buy things for the house. Like these :
I know they are just washcloths but c'mon - the colors just are pretty. Or maybe it's just that 2 pieces of dark chocolate that I had an hour ago that is still keeping me giddy.
Anyways, considering that the alarm is set for 6.5 hours from now, I guess I should get some sleep.
And so to bed.
I have been thinking about ambition lately. About what it means and what it means to me, in particular. I always believed that I wasn't very ambitious. I am only now finding out that that isn't really true. Sure, I might not be driven to assume powerful positions or rake in loads of money. Or become world famous. No, what I am after is broader, less measurable and yet far more tangible to me. Freedom and control. Freedom to work around my life and its' schedules and control over how I spend my time. A life that allows me to learn and grow, hopefully at work too. Learn and grow for the sake of learning and growth. A life where the everyday realities, practicalities and cynicism are well balanced by dreams and hopes realized. Where joy is a frequent visitor and laughter can be taken for granted every once in a while. Where the imperfections of people and relationships still allow for the general gratitude of their being around. Where a sense of purpose and an awareness of its (life's) beauty, fleeting beauty, revitalizes me often enough for me to not drag my feet around too long. Where my wants and wishes are in line with my capacity and faculties. Where the mind might be pensive, but not for too long and where most days, if they don't begin with hope, at least end with it. Sanguine.
That's plenty ambitious, don't you think ?
On a different note, I will always be a kid. I spent more than an hour at Target today, picking up everyday things. The good part about putting off doing such *required* shopping for a while is that you discover some lost joys when you go back to it. It's been quite a while. So, as I walked around the brightly colored Bath section and looked at all the shades of bath rugs and towels, walked past all those beautiful lamps and shades in the Home Decor section, carted by all those lovely hats and scarves next to the Shoes section, and wheeled slowly around the shiny and metallic Kitchen section, I smiled. It is so cool to be an adult and walk around the store and buy things for the house. Like these :
I know they are just washcloths but c'mon - the colors just are pretty. Or maybe it's just that 2 pieces of dark chocolate that I had an hour ago that is still keeping me giddy.
Anyways, considering that the alarm is set for 6.5 hours from now, I guess I should get some sleep.
And so to bed.
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